A few years ago I read a book called The Picture of Dorian Grey by Oscar Wilde. It is a curious book that is both timeless and endlessly quotable. This book was trashed by many critics when it was first published and others even wanted him to be prosecuted on moral grounds. What follows is not a dissection of the book, rather my ramblings on the major theme of one of the characters.

At its core, Wilde’s novel was a pioneer of satire, namely, he seemed intent on exposing the culture of the Victorian era and many of the philosophies that battled against it. The world view of this period was one of propriety, with the virtues of it being focused on maintaining a façade of absolute moral and personal ‘rightness’ in the face of barbarism and hedonism.

It was a time when scorn and public shame would be heaped upon any man who was not stoic and any woman who had even a hint of any ‘unladylike’ qualities. The world view that one of the dominant characters was trying to propagate was that of aestheticism. This was a philosophy that can be a fore-runner to many modern day existentialists (though it should be noted that the first existentialist was Kierkegaard who was a devout Christian). Furthermore, I do not believe that Wilde was arguing for this philosophy, rather was wanting to expose the contradictions of the Victorian era.

Aestheticism deemed that beauty (among other temporal attributes) was the highest pursuit in life and so emotion became the compass that led our lives. This philosophy fed and was led by feelings as a means to find true happiness.

The problem is that emotion is such a double edged sword, willing to damage itself as quickly as it finds happiness. It can be a path to happiness as well as sorrow. It creates as well as it destroys. It binds as fully as it cleaves. It is the route that leads to safety as well as a cliff. It is beautiful and ugly.

Many Christians view all creation as a terrible abomination; a sin filled world that leads to destruction and death only. While there is some truth in this, we forget that God created emotions in man, and He seems to have emotion. Jesus was angry at vendors in the temple, was saddened at the death of Lazarus, and astonished at the faith of a centurion. Emotion was created as a way for us to experience and interact with the world and the people in it. It not only helps solidify our relationship with others, but our relationship with God as well.

That being said, emotion can also be the culprit to why our faith becomes unglued. In Matthew 13, Jesus tells a parable of the four types of soils. I am sure we all are very familiar with this one so I will simply focus on just one; the soil that is covered in thorns and weeds.

This is the soil that is fertile, yet when the plant grows it becomes choked out by the things around it. As I experience more and more in life, I have begun to realize that it the thorns (the circumstances in our lives) are really not the culprit. Rather, the thing that ‘chokes’ our spiritual life is when we decide to let emotion dictate our lives and not truth. What I mean is this; the counter-narratives to the gospel of Christ begin to ‘feel’ better. In my own experience, decisions that are based on a temporal feeling of happiness make me feel better than those of self-control and moderation. Holding a grudge and doing everything I can to make a mockery of that person feels better than going out of my way to make amends; pursuing sex outside of marriage feels better than waiting and saving myself for a future wife.

I think, however, that one of the biggest ‘thorns’ in the Christian walk has nothing to do with alcohol, anger, sex, or money, but is more based in our standing for God. Feeling like a failure in the eyes of God is much more of an issue that the any moral temptation I may face. Can I get an Amen?

When we come to the place (and we all have) of seeing our sin and comparing that to the standard of righteousness that Christ calls us to we must rectify it. One way, which is increasingly common, is to embrace agnosticism/universalism (or atheism that is not well thought out). I have tried this out personally, and it becomes a pick-and-choose theology with no standards for how we live. Another very common way we deal with the tension is to say that ‘I am a horrible human being and I and hoping that God’s grace will forgive me so I can avoid hell.’ We become self-deprecating and stand in shame when we are in prayer and worship.

However, Paul presents us with a third option, one that lets embraces the standard of lifestyle God has laid out for us also lets us come before God in good conscience. This way is by embracing Romans 6:17-18 which states, “But thanks be to God that though you were slaves of sin, you became obedient from the heart to that form of teaching to which you were committed, and having been freed from sin, you became slaves of righteousness.”

We were once slaves to sin when we were born under Adam’s original sin, yet Christ came to not only take away the sin that we have (and will have), but also free us from our internal ties to sin. That is what verse 18 is communicating to us; the freedom from sin. Though our minds are condition to pursue evil, God is on our side to help us fight temptation and we are promised that we can overcome it.

Where emotion fits in to this is that when we read these verses, they may not feel true. We see how God has freed us and then we see that we still sin. The question that arises is this; do we believe our emotion or do we believe the word of God.  It is a question of which standard we will use to judge the value and worth of our lives. We can use the Word of God who lays out His promise that through Jesus we are reconciled with God as our standard, or we can believe the made up standard in our head.

In Oscar Wilde’s book, the main character embraces emotion and strives for happiness at any cost, yet he is ultimately destroyed by it. Furthermore, he ends up destroying those around him as well.

So which will you believe the promise of God or the emotion that keeps us away from Him?

Shalom,

Trae

I am back to recount my recent trip to Kenya with my fellow Americans Doug (aka Dougie D) Robert (aka Robert). If you didn’t see the last post (part 1) calmly skip this one for now, scroll down, and read it…God doesn’t like those who skip ahead.

ANYWAY, when I last left off, we had just finished a week of traveling, speaking to people, meeting local leaders, and avoiding head on collisions with Mutatus. The last one, sadly, became a daily occurrence. We had three days of downtime before we were to start our last 4 days of speaking.

We had moved to a different hotel; the first place we stayed at was in Bungoma, while our new location was in Kitale. This new town was quite a bit larger than any of the other places (about 60,000 people) and so we spent time exploring the area. It had some larger stores, and had more (and better) places to eat.

The most famous (or infamous) aspect, however, of Kitale was in a unique problem it seems to have above other places in Kenya. That problem is glue sniffing. It wasn’t a hidden problem, lurking in the seedy alleyways that were buried in a red-light district, but rather one that you could not walk down the main street without running into people with glue bottles in their hand. Once again, this wasn’t a ‘rebellious youth’ problem (as so many issues are seen within our own culture) but one that had ensnared a wide demographic. There were teenagers, grown men, women, children (8 years and older), and the saddest to see was a women with an infant. 

We didn’t get to go into the heart of the slums in Kitale, but Robert had been there before and said that there would be hundreds of kids sitting around sniffing glue. It is tragic because it ruins their present, future, and their minds. It is an all-consuming vice that people can’t seem to want to escape from. The hardest part is seeing such a ruinous life and knowing that there is little to nothing I can do to help them. I think though, that is always the tension in missional work anywhere in the world.

Similarly, we met a young missionary (Elizabeth) who has worked in Kitale for some time, and we were given a tour of the local hospital. Well, ‘hospital’ may be a bit of a stretch. It has doctors, wards, and will give you care; yet the people wait for about 5 hours to see the extremely overworked doctors, who lack some training and apparently diagnose everything as malaria (though that is the right diagnosis a good percentage of the time probably). As sad as it was to walk around the buildings, all I could think was ‘at least it is something.’ And something is better than nothing….I think…

On a less depressing note, I was glad to be back in African culture and seeing all the funny/weird stuff that happens as a part of everyday life. The highlight was watching a man trying to cut apart a car (to sell the scrap metal) with an axe. He definitely had his work cut out (pun not intended) for him.

We also used this time to begin to prepare for the 4 day conference at a church where our main contact, Paul Odari, was the leader. Paul initiated contact with Doug several years earlier and the two had been talking for quite some time. He is a strong man of God, a leader that the whole community respects, and an all-around good guy. He is one of those people that you are truly blessed to be around.

He holds a conference each year called the Kingdom Impact Conference with the hopes of empowering believers to understand their identity in Christ and the impact God wants them to have on the community. For four days, from dawn till very late at night, people are singing. dancing (in hilarious and surprising ways), preaching, and hearing from God.

Our team spent the conference introducing Christ Life missions, talking about sin and our redemption, spiritual gifts, and church function/structure/leadership. While many from the local community were there, I believe our focus was to the leaders. Whether they were the pastors, elders, or lay people that had the call for leadership, we understand that if falls to the local leaders to do and maintain any work.

On the second to the last day, I was appointed as the official ‘youth pastor’ for the week (against my knowledge and consent…) and so I was given a two hour block to speak to a group of kids who were between the ages of 13-23(ish).

While I am a strong leader in certain areas, ministering to kids has never been on that list. Fortunately my ‘foreigness’ was able to compensate for my lack of skill. I spent 30 minutes on a simple teaching about being a new creation (and what it entails) and our identity not being in our genealogy (which is a lot bigger issue in Africa than here) then spent the last 1.5 hours answering questions. I was asked a lot about scripture (the fall, eating pork, etc.) community (spiritual gifts within a corporate context, evangelism) and a few personal questions (my job, which premiere league team I supported…A LOT bigger deal in Africa than in the states). I was humbled in the way that they looked up to me and really embraced me. I am awkward enough and so their love for me was another blessing. I will definitely be working with them when I go back.

After this we reached the end of our trip, and thanks be to God, no more missed flights. I was very sad to leave the continent, but I felt energized to face the battle of getting prepared to go back and live there.

In any missions work, the truth is that you can’t get much done in 2 weeks. We were able to plant several seeds and trust that the Holy Spirit is working in ways that we cannot.

I had two goals on this trip; first, to be able to physically see the place and people that I will be working around and, secondly, to meet a few people that are wanting to come alongside the vision that we have for Kenya.  

God is good because I was able to accomplish both.

Shalom,

Trae

I am back in the States (what everyone else in the world seems to call the USA) and I am trying to find a good opening line for my recent trip to Kenya…and failing horribly. With that in mind, I guess I will simply jump right in.

On November 26^th, I left Amurica and traveled to Kenya, our first stop was in London (where we had an 8 hour layover so we (Doug, Robert, and I) did the tourist thing and walked around the city for a bit. I was very excited for this because I have never been to Europe even though I have always wanted to so badly.

We took an hour long ride to the heart of London to first find a place to eat before visiting Buckingham palace. We found out quickly that things in London are a bit expensive. Meaning, we ate a dinner that cost the 3 of us about 60 dollars.

The pasta I had was good…but in all reality, not THAT good. Strike one on us for not figuring out the exchange rate beforehand. Just so you know, 15 pounds is about 20 dollars…

ANYWAY, after our lunch the guys wanted to get Starbucks (because that is obviously not something that we could get in America…sorry Doug and Robert) before heading out. We ended up at Buckingham Palace just as it hit dusk, and the place is absolutely beautiful.

We then arrived in Kenya the next day, where we met a few other missionaries. The first two, Evans (Kenyan) and Boyd (Amerikenyan), were men that worked in the largest slum in Nairobi. The other man, Fred Mendoza (aka Doc) is a Dentist who does (surprisingly) Dental missions in Kenya and a few surrounding countries. He was going to go with us on our adventure and I was glad because he was a cool guy.

We packed our 40 bags into the back of Docs CRV at 8am and went to the Mendoza fortress to kill time while we waited for our next flight to Kitale. It was to leave from a small airport at 12:30 so we had (or so we assumed) plenty of time.

What we didn’t know was that several East African presidents were in town, so the 30 minute trip to the airport lasted 2 hours and 30 minutes. Needless to say, we missed our flight.

Not a great start to our trip.

We ate supper (I actually had pizza, and it was surprisingly good for African pizza) and did the drive of shame back to castle Mendoza. Honestly, I was so exhausted at that point that I would not have cared if we were hit by a meteor…I just wanted sleep. We took a quick nap then walked around the area and met a few locals, and finally went to bed early.

The next day we left even earlier (because we were NOT missing the next flight) and landed in Kitale around 1:30.

We were met at the airport by our two Kenyan contacts (Paul and Geoffrey) and were quickly whisked away to our first meeting. As glad as I was to get that extra day to rest, it did mean that we had some ground to make up due to our lateness.

This is when I first was able to experience what it was like to drive in Kenya. At this point in my life, I was under the delusion that Johannesburg, South Africa held the worst drivers. I was completely wrong though.

The two lane ‘highways’ are how everyone gets anywhere. While driving, one must share the road with bicyclists, motorbikes (50 and 100cc, so the top speed is about 30), cars, 18 wheelers, and matatu’s. There is no shoulder, so the bikes and motor bikes become obstacles that you swerve around and so you pass other vehicles with only a foot (many times less than that) of space between. Most of the other cars and 18 wheelers are so dilapidated that they can only drive about 20 mph at best.

The last group is the matatu’s. These are minivans from the underworld that have 14 people squeezed into them, and drive like angry teenagers. They get paid by the trip, not the hour, so safety takes a backseat to getting more shillings. They constantly cut us off, forced us off the road, forced others off the road, and even hit us once but kept driving. Simply put, the idea of pleasure driving in Kenya is nonexistent (also, the $6 per gallon gas doesn’t help).

ANYWAY, we made it to the first church and started our journey.

For the next 4 days we would wake up in the morning, drive (all the while praying that we wouldn’t get hit or hit anyone else) and speak at churches. The plan was to minister to small groups of leaders to tell them our vision and try to connect with those of like mind. The hard part of mission work in Africa is not finding people that want to talk to you , but rather finding people that would like to work with you.

It is not that Africans are lazy (far from it); the truth is that they tend to not realize that they have the same authority in Christ as westerners do. They see us as the spiritual superheroes that have a secret knowledge that allows us to batman away the ailments of their society. Change cannot come from the outside. Meaning, it is not the muzungu (white person in Swahili) that will change a culture, rather the change must be initiated and birthed from within the Kenyan culture.

I see this too often in churches in America.

People think that only a select few ‘pastors’ have a spiritual maturity, so they go once a week to church and try to eat from the scrapes of the Last Supper in a vain hope that their life will improve. Some even spend an hour in a Bible Study, and listen to the wise sage teaching the lesson to try to decipher a way that will make God speak to them more.

The fact is that when you receive the Holy Spirit, when you accept Christ, you have the fullness of God inside you (Colossians 2:9-10). Your life is not a scavenger hunt to obtain the prize of authority; it is the unpacking of the gift of the fullness of God. It is like working out once a week and wondering why you are not in shape. The weekly gathering (sometimes known as church) is not the place where you are supposed to be ‘filled up’ by God; that filling comes by reading (actually reading and meditating) the word and spending time with God.

Church won’t fix your life. Spending time in a small group won’t fix your life. Putting your problems on a prayer card won’t fix your life. Listening to Christian radio won’t fix your life. Reading a devotional won’t fix your life. These things help, but only spending time letting God change you will fix your life.

The church at large is impotent because that is what we have chosen. The church is incapable of impacting our society because we have yet to let it impact our own lives.

I say all this because it is what drives our message in Kenya. We are there not to change their society, but rather to help transform the believers in Kenya so that they can begin to transform their community. We don’t know the all the issues that plagues a rural African community, but we do know the God that can guide them to alleviate those issues. God wants to change Kenya (as well as everywhere else) and we were there to help them understand that God can use the local people to accomplish this.

I will get off my soapbox now.

This has summed up my first week in Kenya. Part two will be coming shortly and I thank you for your interest in my life thus far. God revealed so much through this trip and I am happy to share it with you. Talk to you in a few days.

Shalom,

Trae

I heard an interview of an author who talked about his influences growing up. He spoke of both classical and modern authors who by the tools of their craft, unsettled him so much that he felt burdened to continue this tradition.

Similarly, the author told us of a teacher that he had while in college. This was an individual who knew the value of a good question. More to the point, the question that was asked after each book that the class read was this; ‘what character did you dislike, and what did that character reveal about yourself?’ Whether antagonist, villain, or foil, the character is always (unless the book is badly written) one who represents a part of society or human nature that is detestable.

Biblically, the apostle Thomas is one I have always felt an immense love and simultaneous hatred for. And yes, I just admitted to sort of hating an apostle.

Ironically the virtue that I was attracted to and repulsed by was the adjective that inevitably precedes his name; that is, the attribute of doubting. I know that doubting is talked about negatively throughout the sacred text (i.e. one who is an infant, one that is tossed about by the waves, dual minded, an idiot) yet I identified with that quality more than ones of Paul, Peter, or Judas (though 30 pieces of silver would buy me a better car…just saying).

Thomas’ doubt was not rooted in pessimism or intellectual apathy (which is what most of the scriptures condemning doubt are focused on), but rather it is cemented into our frail and limited understanding of the spiritual realm. Some have the gifting of faith, and for that I am in awe of you (meaning you irritate me…but in a good way) yet most of us struggle with this issue.

At that point of trepidation, we make the choice (consciously or unconsciously) to take the easy path or the hard one. The easy path is the instant gratification, it is comfortable and well worn, and it deceives us into nirvana (not the band). This is the place that we go to die.

The inverse road is the narrow gate, through the looking glass, and taking the red pill. It is seeing the closed door and deciding that you will have to slither out through the window. It is the place where we look back many years later and see that we have truly and irrevocably changed something.

John 11:16 holds the account of my favorite Thomas moment. When Jesus tells his disciples that He wants to go to an area of persecution to heal someone, out protagonist says to all the disciples ‘let us go, that we may die with Him.’ This wasn’t a case of masochism on Thomas’ part, but rather an understanding of the dangers of following Him as well as an understanding the need for us to forsake comfort and safety so something amazing can happen.

I guess the problem is and always has been choice…

Shalom,

Trae

It’s not so much that I have lost the desire to write, but rather I have not felt inspired to write. I believe that a few times every day I keep telling myself that I need to write something on here…but that has not translated into something actually being recorded.

I open my computer and end up on YouTube. I sometimes worry that the world might end and we won’t even notice.

ANYWAY, this week might be more of an update rather than me preaching at you (I might lay off the condemnation for the week). I want to tell you about what has been going on with me spiritually as God prepares me for whatever is to come.

First, I have mentioned before that I have always had trouble with intimacy with God (as weird as that feels to actually write that out…); I am sure I am not alone…hopefully. This, however, is one of the things that is happening in my walk. God seems to be intent (irritatingly sometimes) about making me understand how key that is to have that developed. This is good because this is what being a disciple is all about as I have talked about on a previous blog (I think and hope).

Secondly, I have been reading through the book of Nehemiah and it is really helping me recover. I believe that when I came back from Africa last year, I was completely exhausted; not so much physically but spiritually. I had been pouring out for months and months and I was at the end of my rope. In the prophet’s book, he went to Jerusalem to rebuild the walls that had been destroyed. I felt like Jerusalem; I felt I was spent and broken down.

Not only was I dealing with trying to figure my future out, I trying to figure it out while having little alone time with God and not really caring.

In other words, I think I was easy prey for Satan.

One part that has really stuck out to me is that in Nehemiah 4, the workers get wind of a foul plot afoot, and are told to have armed guards with the workers so that they would be ready to defend at any moment. For me, God was trying to rebuild my walls, which had fallen into disrepair, and yet I was letting Satan lead me.

It was a huge wakeup call but since that revelation I have been trying to be more intentional about my prayer time I have learned that when I ask God to teach me how to pray and how to simply be in his presence, He is faithful.

So, this is the end of the tale. I hope to soon know more about where I will be going and what I will be doing but in the mean time, I appreciate all the prayers and am content with sitting and learning.

Shalom,

Trae

So I figure that after two months of nothing I should probably write something….about something. It has honestly been a rough few months since my last post; a lot of fighting to keep my vision focused and alive.

After spending about 14 hours completing paperwork and phone interviews with an organization that I thought I would be partnering with fell through, I think I hit a bit of a snag. What I was reminded of is that when we give something over to God, we shouldn’t be surprised if He takes that away.

Fortunately I have learned my lesson (or hopefully I have) and so I am moving on. I am currently in talks with another organization, so we will see what happens next.

Lately, I have had to wait on God. As I said in my last post, I have felt stagnant for the past 5 months now, like I have been living but not moving towards anything. I still feel called to the international mission field but it feels like none of my steps have gotten me any closer.

One of the aspects of being a missionary is that I am allowed a level of conversation that some do not get to have and what I have seen is that a lot of people feel this way as well.

What I mean is that so many of us have an amazing transformational period where God is completely reshaping and remolding parts of our lives. That we are dead in some areas and He comes in and cuts out that death and replaces it with life. This change happens, usually, over several months, and we are completely blown away by this change.

And then it stops.

We look back and wonder why we do not feel the same way. We read, pray, and spend time with God and yet we feel we are missing something. We begin to struggle with new issues, and doubt creeps in that we were ever changed or loved by Him in the first place.

I think part of this is the fact that God seems to move a lot more slowly than we think He should. That is part of the problem, we read the Bible and see the constant barrage of God moving mightily in people all in the span of a few pages.

One of my favorite stories is the life of Elijah in 1 Kings. He is a prophet who resurrected a dead boy, infinitely multiplied the oil and flour for a widow, called down fire on command, and out ran a chariot. All of this takes place within 3 chapters, yet the actual process took years. He spent (I presume) years living by himself being fed by birds and then with a passive aggressive widow in a place that was not Israel (a big deal for Jews).

When Nehemiah heard of the devastation of Jerusalem, He was anguished and spent 3 months (Nehemiah 1) praying to God about it. He wanted to help in some way, yet God was silent for so long before he was called.

In the parable of the ten virgins (Matthew 25) there is an odd story about 10 brides that have to wait for their groom (this is not a story supporting polygamy…just so you know). Five of them bring extra oil while the remaining do not. They are not told how long the night will last; they are only told to wait.

So many times we are given this instruction…just wait.

During this time, I think we begin to question God. We question what He has said, we question whether we are doing the right thing, and we question why we didn’t bring a flipping jacket because it is starting to get cold.  

I believe that this waiting shows us why we do what we do. Maybe we are struggling with sin, doubt, direction, or purpose. We wait because we feel burdened with something and we may not even know what it is. Yet how we wait determines what happens. Do we bring the oil to keep that fire going even when the darkness is so oppressing or do we give up halfway through? Do we keep trying to hear the voice of God or do we say it is just a waste of time?

The doubt and fear that likes to wait with us is natural, though we shouldn’t let it get a foothold. Waiting passively is why so many have fallen away; why so many people have let that doubt control them.

Waiting actively is waiting with anticipation. We acknowledge that we have doubt and fear but we have faith that the groom will show up despite the circumstances. It is being vigilant with our prayer and quiet time that keeps the lamp burning.

All relationships are like this, we have moments of high emotion and extreme growth, but what we have to discipline ourselves to do is be able to wait in the moments where things seem mundane. In the end, I believe those are the relationships that stand the test.

Finally, the part of the ten virgins’ story that gives me the most hope is that the 5 had each other throughout the wait.

This is our brothers and sisters in Christ. This is the Church.

Shalom,

Trae

Since being back in the states I have many things to get used to again. Some of these I have welcomed with open arms (i.e.Chipoltle, electricity that doesn’t go out when a storm comes…or a slight breeze) yet other changes have been much harder to cope with.

The biggest disharmony since being back is the fact that my context has shifted. In Africa, I was out ministering every day, all day. When I was in the villages, I would wake up and eat breakfast (the inshima I don’t miss too much) and be out ministering by 9. We would minister till it was dark and go back to the hut I was staying at and eat dinner. While dinner was being prepared, I would be trying to take every chance to minister to the zone manager I was with.

Flash forward to today and I feel slightly useless. While God is still using me for ministry, it is not 8 to 5 hut to hut evangelism and riding on a bike to get there (a vision of the Mormons just flashed into my head). This has been the most difficult transition because it feels like I am not doing much, that I am just spinning my wheels. I know that this is not true, that God uses me in every context blah blah blah; but sometimes this frustration brings me to a crippling halt.

As with everything, there are times when it doesn’t bother me and there are times when it does. I think one issue is that when God calls us into a new context, God uses that time sanctify us in a different way.

In Africa, I was being built up to learn how to function in third world, individualistic, and slightly sweaty conditions. It was less about learning the foundational wisdom, and more about learning the practical knowledge and self actualization.

In the villages, a relationship with God was easier because it was, at its core, a necessity. What I mean is, no one can function for more than a week on their own power. I had to learn what the voice of the Spirit sounded like at each hut to know what to say, and I had to learn to spend time with God any chance I could get because it was the only way to refresh myself from the hardship of ministering all day (all day is not hyperbole in this case).

Since coming back, I see why it is so hard for Americans to connect with God. The truth is that our society doesn’t need a lot of faith. I don’t need faith that the rains will come (food will always be in the store), I don’t need faith for healing (because I just go to a doctor), and I have all the money that I need to survive lavishly (the Zambians do not get this luxury).  On top of that we have all of the entertainment and Chipoltle (see how I have come full circle?) we could want to distract us. I have learned also, that when ministering isn’t my ‘job requirement’ I tend to freak out.

So I am coping with the struggle to figure out what it means to minister in a place that you usually cannot always minister so openly.

My insight that God showed me is that it does not (nor should not) mean I should always be ministering how I did in Africa. That maybe sitting down with a friend to talk about life is just as much ‘ministering’ as calling a meeting around a fire and preaching. Meaning, that simply listening and fellowshipping with friends and family can be a form of ministry too.  Meaning, that simply being with others and inviting the Spirit into the conversation is just as powerful as a full blown 2 hour sermon on our adoption into the lineage of Christ.

Acts 2:42 says that “They (the first church) devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer.” The ‘overly spiritual things’ are obvious ministry, but it is interesting that they throw fellowship in there as well. Somehow, this time spent talking and sharing a meal is just as important as prayer and studying the knowledge of Christ.

Don’t misunderstand (not that you ever would) my point. I don’t think that we are relieved of our duties to pray and study scripture or preach the 2 hour sermon; I simply think that maybe we shouldn’t burden ourselves with the (nonexistent) obligation to only do the outwardly spiritual practices.

I visited my Grandparents and went on a drive with my Grandpa who showed me (again) all the places in central Kansas that were important to him. The houses that he lived in and the oil wells he helped manage. In that moment I really felt like God was showing me that the most righteous action I could take at that moment was not to ask if he knew if he would go to heaven.

Rather, the most holy and God pleasing thing was to sit back and soak in the history and beauty of what he was telling me. In the end, if God is love, and I am filled with God, then me being a loving grandson was bringing the presence of God into that Ford Taurus.

Shalom,

Trae

So it’s been a while since I have updated and some of you may be curious about what what I have been up to. Or maybe your just bored and reading this because you really have nothing better to do. Whatever the reason, I want to tell you all about what I am up to and where I am going…and a there is a link to pictures of my trip at the end.

Since coming back I have had to make the hard decision of leaving Overland Missions. It is a wonderful organization and has an amazing vision for Africa (and other continents as well) but it ultimately is not a very good fit for me theologically. I love all my brothers and sisters working in Zambia and am heartbroken to leave Nyawa; yet I know in my spirit that it just will not workout long term.

Even though I won’t be returning to Overland, my time spent in Nyawa was not a waste. Not only was I able to disciple, encourage, and heal many people but I also was shown what type of missions I would like to pursue.

The great thing about missions organizations is that there are positions to serve in every context. Whether urban, rural, in the field, administrative, third world, or first world, there is an organization for everything. Nyawa taught me that (for at least the next few years) I will be pursuing third world urban missions (probably in sub-Sahara Africa…but that is still negotiable). I fell in with sleeping in a tent, staying with villagers who live in stick and mud huts, and eating a steady diet of the indigenous cuisine. Unfortunately there are only a handful of organizations that provide this opportunity but I have found a few that I am actively pursuing. I believe that I will return to the mission field in the winter of this year….hopefully. Currently I am looking for a place to work till I leave.

This is starting to feel like a breakup letter…

My prayer requests for right now are that I find the organization that I fit into and that I am able to find a decent job…one that I have some flexability to leave for any mission training.

I want to thank all of you again for all your support and thank you for all your prayers and continued interest in what I am doing. I would also like to thank Overland Missions and the Schwertfegers for giving me the opportunity to pursue what I love and helping shape me and mold me.

Thank you so much, and as promised click here for my flickr page that has photos of my trip, I will add more as time goes and add descriptions that paint a better tale of what I saw. Once again if you would like to meet with me and hear more about my trip or have me speak to a group, my new email is tjbriscoe@yahoo.com (or if you have any other questions or comments).

Thanks again, and as always…

Shalom,

Trae

Well…not really.

Hear is a testamony from a woman that I ministered to in Zambia. Keep reading or Click here to read the story from Overland Missions website. The wife of the man that I was working with wrote the story.

‘There is a woman in a village called Siamundele. For much of her life, she has been tortured by dark spiritual forces, resulting in illness, oppression, depression, and more. In Zambia, as in much of Africa in general, there is a very real sense of the spiritual world that we live in. They are a spiritually hot people who understand that what we see with our eyes is often not the only thing happening around us. This woman has been told by various witch doctors that in order to be “protected” from these spirits that plague her she must wear multiple charms infused with various magic concoctions, meant to hold the spirits at bay and appease them. The charms have increased her sense of despair. She feels weighed down. Burdened. Confused.

One day, she randomly attended a meeting led by a young missionary called Trae. She didn’t have plans to attend the meeting, but wandered in at random searching for anything that would lift her physical an emotional pain. Trae, a young man who spent almost every day ministering in the deep rural areas, spoke about love and grace and acceptance. The woman barely understood the concept. But she felt something. She felt the possibility of a different life. So, when the young missionary asked for those who needed healing to come forward, she went.

Trae quietly asked her why she was wearing so many charms and potions. She explained, saying that she had no choice. She needed protection from the things that haunted her. Trae gently explained that in order to put trust in the one true God, all others must be forsaken.  He said that he would gladly pray for her healing, but that first she should remove the strings that burdened her more than she knew. Trae handed the charms over to a leader to be burnt. And then he prayed for her healing. He prayed for the pain to leave her body AND her soul, and for her to put her trust in Jesus, our only hope.

Slowly and steadily, like the gradual lightning of the morning from darkness, she began to feel different. She felt lighter. More hopeful. Less burdened by pain. She thanked the young man, and left…wondering. Wondering what had just occurred to free her of the pain she had carried for as long as she could remember.

Time passed. Trae went back to America for the holidays. The woman continued to feel…different. But, she knew something that Trae didn’t know. She knew that there was something she had kept from him. From God. And she wanted to change that. She wanted complete freedom. Total release from the forces that had imprisoned her for years. She wanted to make the decision that had seemed impossible at first, but now made more sense than anything else.

So, she walked. She walked all the way to the home of Aaron, a man of God and a leader in the Nyawa Sector. Aaron was the very man that burnt her charms on that day when Trae prayed for her. She had something to tell him.

When she reached his house, she explained to him that she had experienced much joy with the healing that had taken place on that day. But that she hadn’t placed all of her trust in the Lord. She said that she had been afraid that day, afraid to place everything in one basket. She had been so hurt in the past. So, instead of surrendering ALL of her charms to Trae, she had kept one carefully tied around her waist. Hidden, under her chitenge. While she talked to Aaron, she reached for it, and broke it from around her body. She handed it to Aaron, saying, “Please give this to that young man. And tell him to burn it. I have placed my faith in Jesus Christ now…and I am free.” ‘-Jesse Schwertfeger

Shalom,

Trae

I am safely back in America and am being constantly suprised by this new culture I am living in (i.e. carpet, driving on the right side of the road). Thanks for all your prayers and support over these last 6 months. Thank you.

I just want to let everyone know that if you would like me to speak about my experiences as a missionary at a bible study, fellowship gathering, small group, or church (or anywhere really) please feel free to contact me. My email is s_dime777@yahoo.com. I would love to speak about what I saw and experienced.

Thanks and as always…

Shalom,

Trae